Only a few days left...

Only a few days until I depart. I can hardly believe how fast the time has gone! My heart aches every time I think of leaving -- you don't know how many times I have almost changed my ticket but it is just so not practical. I would lose so much money in change fees, OR have to blow off my friend in Korea (which I definitely do not want to do), or come home at the end of September, which would mean about $2500 of lost revenue from not teaching. I am telling myself that the money I am saving will be better spent coming back here next year, when I am more well versed in Swahili and have studied the country more in depth. I want to stay with all my heart, but that $2500 is another plane ticket, so its time to be practical.

This morning in the nursery school I was holding Aziza, one of my favorites (because she is so quiet and withdrawn, I always make sure to give her a little extra love), and I burst into tears. But, since I will see a friend later I put on some makeup, so then of course there was mascara and eyeliner running down my face. One of the sewing girls cracked up laughing, and later Mama Fortunata said that she was saying, "Mzungu cries black tears!!!" We all started laughing at that one...!

Today has been pretty awesome so far. I took 5 of the sewing / vocational girls to Mwenzi Hospital (the government hospital) to get their HIV tests and all came out negative, including me! We then went out to a cafe and drank sodas and ate donuts, and then they go to skip the rest of the day of school, hahaha. Tomorrow I will give my HIV lecture to the Kilimahewa secondary school after the recess break. I won't have the opportunity to take them to Mwenzi but at least I'll give them the talk and the sewing girls can be there as a resource (i.e. it's easy!) The doctors at Mwenzi in the HIV / AIDS clinic seem very loving and caring, which is a relief.

This afternoon I will go to Msanmaria, the home for streetkids. All have been abandoned by their parents or have no parents (usually dead from HIV). Some have been forced to do horrible things to survive. The workers of this place drive around Moshi at night looking for homeless kids sleeping on the street and pick them up and take them back here. At Msanmaria they are given a safe place to live, a bed and several meals per day. Each child awaits sponsorship so they can go to school, but Msanmaria has a rather proactive campaign to raise money for these kids. They are amazing kids, so caring and protective of each other. This was a special placement for my roommate Sophia (sadly she has left and is back in Seattle), so I am going to make sure to go there every day until I leave on Saturday (I've already been several times and absolutely adore the kids).

I cannot wait to come back to Tanzania. I have made so many good friends in this country, friends that are as true and close to me in one month of living as friends that I have know for a year or more. This is such a special place, and I know I will be counting the days until I finally step off the plane in Tanzania once more. Yes there is tragedy and poverty, but the amount of love and kindness that exists in this country is exponentially more than anything I have ever experienced in my entire life.